Find The YOU In Your Story
Do you know what drives your writing? Have you thought about why you’re writing your work-in-progress? Have you explored the common threads that run through all of your stories?
The more I get to know myself or, ahem, stop hiding from myself, the more I see the same themes in every area of my life. These themes shape my relationships, free time, work, play, and creativity. They are the wires that power and move me.
I call these my values—the ideas I hold most dear which motivate my choices.
My values are:
Connection—With myself and others
Authenticity—I want to be more myself more of the time
Emotional Bravery—Speaking my truth
Agency—The ability to determine who I am and what I do
For a while, I felt bad about these values. They’re not regal or honorable. They’re not world peace, or justice, or responsibility. They’re just so…me.
But these values are ingrained in every part of my life, and they are the unique contribution I make to the world, whether I like it or not.
Two of the places these values shine are in my writing and my coaching.
For me, writing is about finding the hidden truth within myself and giving it voice (emotional bravery). It's a place where I can be fully myself (authenticity) and become more of the person I want to be (agency). And my goal is to impact my readers (connection). I want them to know they aren’t alone, see new parts of themselves, and be brave enough to live from those places. (Can you find my values in that sentence?)
These ideas also permeate my coaching; they are what I aspire to help my clients achieve. I want my clients to be fully themselves (authenticity) so they can express their truth (emotional bravery). I want them to tell the story they want to tell in the way they want to tell it (agency) so that they can help readers have greater empathy for themselves and others (connection).
My values might not sound as admirable as “world peace,” but, in my own way, they facilitate peace, justice, equity, and love.
Here’s my point: Your values are specific to you and how you impact the world. We need you to live your values because we need to be shaped by them, and that means writing with your values in mind.
So, do you know your values?
If you don’t, here’s an activity that may help. Answer these questions:
What do you most admire in other people?
What kinds of stories resonate with you?
What questions come up over and over again in your life?
What themes recur in your writing and creativity?
How do you most want to impact people?
Then, look for common themes in your answers. Can you identify 3-5 values?
Once you know your values, bring them to your writing. Post them on your wall so you can remember why you’re pouring so much time and energy into this novel. Use them to test opportunities. Ask yourself if this thing puts you in greater alignment with your values or moves you away from them?
And most importantly, when the imposter syndrome and comparison kick in and you start to doubt yourself, come back to these values. Your values matter. The way you show up in the world matters. Don’t worry about how other people are impacting the world, seize the wonderful ways that only you can impact the world.
Okay, now that you know your values, leave a comment and let me know one of them. Seriously, I think it’s incredible how different we all are, and I’d love to know what drives you.